Time, Truth and A Possible Destiny


Arnie was walking briskly down the road looking at everything around him when a man stopped him and asked the following question,, “Sorry to bother you, but do you have the time? ” Arnold paused, and beamed at the man as if he was a new believer and said. “The time sir: I have the time, the truth and road to your destiny. Let the joy of living pour out of every orifice. Let people share in the glory of your being.” He paused briefly while he considered this statement. The stranger was looking slightly unsettled but was currently doing no more than shift his weight from one foot to the other.

“Possibly not any orifice below the waist” Arnold corrected himself, and maybe not the ears and the nose is a bit dodgy….. Let the joy of life pour out of your mouth and eyes”. At last he’d got it right, but now the figure of the man was receding from his view at a brisk pace, apparently unmoved by this newly revealed road to joy.

Unbowed, our cheery prophet returned home, to enjoy a welcome coffee at ten o’clock on this Thursday morning. His wife looked surprised to see him, but before she could say anything he told her, “Let the joy of life pour out of your heart: let it shine and speak from your eyes and mouth.” Moving, and even inspiring as this statement was, his wife decided to put it on one side for the moment, and she asked him what he was doing at home at this hour of the day.

“I got sacked” he said, beaming with riotous exuberance, as the full power of his message coursed and galloped through his being. “Why?” she asked quickly, worried that he was about to launch into a fresh rhapsody before leaving Planet Facts. “We were having a ‘Blue Sky’ meeting about the budgets for the next year and Dave asked my opinion.”

“And you told him Let the Joy of life etc”. Her husband beamed at her, and even softened slightly because she always understood what he was saying so well. “Yes, I told him, ‘Let the Joy of Life shine out of…”

“Yes yes yes” said his wife, now fully ‘up to speed’ on the recent events. “And what do you think we should do now?”

“Face life with unflinching courage,” her husband continued,” Remain unbowed before setbacks, and march forward to the Promised Land. More specifically” he added seeing his wife’s attention beginning to wander, “I think we should withdraw our savings and go place them on the lottery. Say to the fates, bold, unbowed and clear. Here is our statement of intent, do your worst, extend the odds against winning if you must; frighten us if you can, but we will climb the mountain: we will venture through unmapped terrain toward our Shangri La.”

“Can I see your bank card for a minute”, his wife interrupted, and without thinking as his mind was busy assembling the next statement, he placed it in the relieved and outstretched palm of her hand. “You sit down for a second while I make you a coffee” she said and left the room.

What she did was ring his work place and ask to speak to Arnold’s boss. “Did you really sack him” she enquired, given that he’s your brother in law”. “No, I didn’t” her brother replied, but I was hoping the shock, might bring him down to earth”. “We’ll what got into him, do you know?”

“Yes,” her brother replied, “Some new guy started this morning, and when Arnie said he had a headache, this guy gave him an aspirin which may not have been an aspirin. He hasn’t been really been sacked. The bank manager is coming along later, and I didn’t want our accountant telling him about the joy of life and that we want to withdraw all our money and put it on the lottery,” he continued, “What we need is profits, and not prophets and then he started laughing and wheezing into the phone, until he seemed to be gibbering with hysteria :shrieking and sucking noises could be heard bouncing around the earpiece “Are you alright” his sister asked him. “I had a slight headache this morning” he said. “I’m coming over” she replied and put the phone down

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About Peter Wells aka Countingducks

Trying to remember what my future is
This entry was posted in character, creative writing, Fiction, humour, Peter Wells, Uncategorized and tagged , , , , . Bookmark the permalink.

15 Responses to Time, Truth and A Possible Destiny

  1. mikesteeden says:

    A tale that lives up to its title. Thoroughly enjoyable read, Peter.

    Liked by 1 person

  2. caminodetim says:

    Really love this.

    Liked by 2 people

  3. A pleasure to read, as always! For me this story warns of the dangers in taking cliched self-help guides and inspirational slogans too literally. A witty and charming piece 🙂

    Liked by 1 person

  4. Ahh… enlightenment as a malady; brilliant! Those headaches can lead to lifelong hangovers… lol!

    Liked by 1 person

  5. Excellent Monday morning warning tale.

    Like

  6. ksbeth says:

    sometimes the light is too bright, and causes a bad headache. great piece –

    Like

  7. I too had a slight headache this morning… but because I didn’t take a pill I can say with the clearest of minds that “this is pure vintage Countingducks”.

    Liked by 1 person

  8. Who is this guy who gave Arnie and aspirin that wasn’t an aspirin and could you please tell him there’s a position available in my office? Thanks!

    Like

  9. Al says:

    Hilarious, Peter, and quite a testimonial on the perils of self-medicating.

    Like

  10. curioushart says:

    This is really funny. He should take his aspirin and (as my father-in-law used to say), stick it where the sun don’t shine.

    Like

  11. inaschroderszeeders says:

    Wonderful. This made me laugh 🙂 X

    Like

  12. A wonderful story. I too hope the ‘aspirin’ wears off.

    Like

  13. Brilliant.
    Hilarious.
    Insightful.
    xxx

    Liked by 1 person

  14. hipsyartist says:

    Loved it, what a great read!

    Liked by 1 person

  15. nelle says:

    Ooh, this was clever. Clever! So he went on a short trip, without need of luggage.

    Like

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