First Love’s Eternity


You lived creatively letting art define your life, fearless in your every day, walking the path I should have walked if I had courage in my veins; but I was a percentage man, careful always not to fail. I talked of art but lived by common sense and progressed cautiously toward an unmarked death.

At first you welcomed me, and drowned me with your kisses, opening yourself to me in pagan celebration sure that I, like you, was of the chosen few, who recognised the secret of life will only be discovered creatively. How we loved to swap observations, and nestle with each other by the fire and talk of love. I touched your skin and felt each brush of it to be a prayer. Your lips, for that short time, were mine to kiss and face to hold: wonder was our chemistry, and gold the colour which framed our life, for we had found eternity.

I lost my nerve at last, and talked of safe professions, a refuge from the fear that those who live to dream will pay a cost until, one day, that love I drank of so freely from your eyes shrank to a trickle of regret.

You painted like a girl possessed while I trained for my bar exams and we drifted on complicitly, avoiding the unspoken truth, that you were fearless and I was not. An agent came to see your work, sent there by a man of note, and the rest we know is history. You have created these forty years and I have not, but I read of you in magazines, and sometimes when silence fills my life, I take the portrait you made of me, a young man with a dream to chase, staring out courageously, for that was how you saw me then.

Life becomes your memories and in that place I love you still. I never speak your name out loud, and make no reference to your work but in that garden where we sat, innocent of encroaching truth, I sit, as so I often did, and feel your hand move through my hair.

 

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About Peter Wells aka Countingducks

Trying to remember what my future is
This entry was posted in character, creative writing, faith, Fiction, Life, Love, Peter Wells, Relationships, Romance, Talent, writing and tagged , , , , , , , . Bookmark the permalink.

17 Responses to First Love’s Eternity

  1. gotham girl says:

    absolutely breathtaking.

    Like

  2. mikesteeden says:

    A tale of romance, lost love…perhaps – certainly with me – the hardest thing to write well. Write very well indeed you have here. Not that I’m jealous or anything like that…sits in chair head butting his desk!

    Like

  3. John says:

    Never settle! That’s what I took away from this, though becoming a lawyer (that’s BAR, right?) is plenty successful in my eyes. I would say law is an even riskier career move given the current job market.

    Like

  4. A love affair destroyed by the notion of practicality. Oh but then, sometimes, opposites do attract.

    Like

  5. L. R. Palmer says:

    Beautiful! Rich and melancholy, and vibrant with “truth.” Makes me feel alive… Thank you!

    Like

  6. Keigh Ahr says:

    A touching, lyrical ode on the interplay of life and art.

    Like

  7. Al says:

    As another of those afraid-to-fail artistic wannabes, this post resonates with me. I’ve already taken to canvas to refine my stick figures so as to be suitable for public display. Who knows, maybe I’ll even do some courtroom renderings down the line.

    Like

  8. Shonnie says:

    Beautiful. You paint lovely pictures with your words.

    Like

  9. A beautiful, haunting and melancholic story which tugs at the heart-strings. How many, I wonder, have felt this way. Superbly told, Peter.

    Like

  10. ksbeth says:

    ah, the gentle sigh of regret – your use of language is beautiful.

    Like

  11. Scarlet says:

    Beautiful, Mr Ducks.
    SX

    Like

  12. judithhb says:

    Peter you tell a story in few words. But what words. Evocative, charming, sincere and longing all well wrapped together to tell of this love lost. I envy you this ability even if Mike claims he doesn’t. Then why is he hitting his head on his desk?

    Like

  13. I often wonder why so often in life that opposites attract each other. Yes, they can fill each others empty spaces, but they can break each other just as easily as you so eloquently showed us.

    Like

  14. Beautiful depiction of love lost

    Like

  15. michele says:

    I wonder often how much of you is truly reflected in your work. Most authors do not conjure enough feeling in a short to make me wonder, but thank you for writing with such depth that you do.

    Liked by 1 person

    • What a nice thing to say. None of my writing is literal biography but it is drawn on my observations and experiences, like all writers I suppose, and, like many authors who write what I call, “Literal fiction” I have led a full life which has provided an insight into many situations, or so I think.

      Like

  16. Pingback: I Was A Percentage Man | Kevin Barrett's Blog

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