A Train-Wreck Love Affair

For me, at least, that “Moment” when you think you’ve met a women who may be “The one” doesn’t happen too often in your life: the moment when a girl or women you find quite pretty or interesting, intriguing or whatever the polite phrase of the day is, actually smiles at you. The day a door of opportunity creaks open to reveal a future you never thought possible, even a week before you met her.

Of course, I already knew that: I had walked through a similar looking door four years previously and now “Mess” describes my personal life, and evidence of poor judgement and lack of will littered my entire circumstance. Still, just because things are messy does not mean I cannot dream or long for opportunity. “Be brave.” I told myself, “Get it right for once. After all, I can clear the current mess up once I’ve drunk from the goblet of romance, and brought some colour back to a monochrome existence. I know you’ll understand.” I cannot let a chance like this slip through my life.

You were a “moment” in my life; a woman whose face softened and then smiled as I drew you to me and embraced you with all the tenderness years without recognition can produce in the emotionally malnourished male. You were that moment when “Being” and passion swept away all practical niceties, reluctant responsibilities or moral sensibility: the moment which will always be treasured and regretted in my memory.

Within days you had a sense that all was not as it should be; that my talk was more of wishes than of facts, and my careless way with promises had caused problems all my life, but, after a years of restrictions, recently widowed and tentatively connecting with your creative spirit once again, I seemed like the promise of some new beginning and you so wanted me to be as I seemed. You wanted me to be everything the man who taught you to celebrate life again should be.

At last, flooded by emotion, and in a moment of reckless candour, I told you “There is a wife located at my home in the country,” and you remarked on the use of the detached third person when I disclosed her presence in my life. “Did you have to wait until I loved you to tell me that?” you asked me, and I said it was not deliberate. “Chaos seldom is” you said, as you left my flat and then my life.

About Peter Wells aka Countingducks

Trying to remember what my future is
This entry was posted in Affair, character, creative writing, Fiction, Love, Peter Wells, Romance and tagged , , , , , , . Bookmark the permalink.

11 Responses to A Train-Wreck Love Affair

  1. elizaberrie says:

    I often wonder why people get involved with another before their previous commitment is over. I think it is like you said, “I’ve drunk from the goblet of romance” and you get hooked on wanting that feeling all the time, becoming a romance addict.

    Once divorced, I think my mother was worried I too would go head strong into another romance, married to yet another disappointment. It never happened and I broke my addiction to the craving. Now I think the realist in me has taken over and I will never feel that way, ever.

    Good for her to walk out.


  2. Romance – a flower to be tended in its season. It never dies, but it does have seasons.


  3. Yes, well I might find all that a bit appealing until you dropped that bomb!!


  4. The question is: is the door newly opened, or was it always so, just waiting for your character to step through. A story which certainly creates discussion!


  5. ksbeth says:

    ah, one foot on each side of the river. and soon to fall into the rapids.


  6. nelle says:

    Heh, chaos is seldom deliberate. Don’t I know it. wish I didn’t. 😉


  7. Ah, the third person declaration! He said it in the third person about the third person in the doomed love affair. You are a clever, clever person, my friend!

    Liked by 1 person

  8. beetleypete says:

    Nicely constructed, and says much in few words. To be applauded indeed, Peter.

    Nice to see you over on my blog today. I hope that you read the first part, before ‘Tubby’s Toe’, or it would be unlikely to make sense.
    Best wishes from Norfolk. Pete.


  9. L. R. Palmer says:

    Interesting, honest and real. And I can feel both sides of this story – well done! Bottom line: life IS messy sometimes, if we are truly living it… no judgments here. 🙂


  10. Well told. I enjoyed this.


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