I Have a Failing

Over time I have had my success and failures and this has meant I  have met with people from a wide range of circumstances. People are people in the main,so apart from the size of their fridge and the quality of the holiday all is much of a muchness. Well, that’s not exactly true but it will do for now. The point I am ambling towards is that you meet a broad range of people and one meeting sticks in my mind.

The man was well- rounded as  a result of several lunches. I was one of a group of people in the same gathering as him and I was there through a friend. I did not know him directly. He soon started remarking on his latest succesful career moves with unabashed self-admiration before continuing with how he met some celebrity at a famous restaurant and they confirmed to him that he was ,indeed a marvellous fellow. The conversation, or rather his monologue ,continued in much the same vein for some time and I felt my patience starting to wear extremely thin. For the sake of my friend I hung onto it, but it took some doing.

There are things I really dislike: self-importance, boasting unneccessary drama, courtier like slithering personalities but sometimes I miss the point of the vulnerability within. . Why I am so hostile to these aspects of human nature is hard for me to fathom.

We all have behaviours and mannerisms we find hard to handle but through force of circumstance I have been made to notice that people with such characteristics are as likely to be kind or understanding as anyone else. All that happens is that I am so put off by my initial reaction that I cease to examine the character. With those to whom I am more naturally drawn I continue to look at them with curiosity, delighting in them as I might a flower or a wild animal.

It’s nothing more than prejudice really based on a blindness to my own failings which, I presume, I consider to be less troubling than those I find it hard to deal with.

Apart from his pomposity and self admiration there was nothing untoward about the character, and he seemed as decent as the next man. In that room a good range of failings were on display but I could hardly see them for examining his. Over time I have found, once you get to know these people they may be as kind or loyal as the next man but such is my irritation that I missed these aspects of his character. The reason, sadly, is that, in certain circumstances I lack patience. Now there’s a failing for you


About Peter Wells aka Countingducks

Trying to remember what my future is
This entry was posted in character, community, creative writing, Life, life2, Relationships and tagged , , , , , , , , , . Bookmark the permalink.

17 Responses to I Have a Failing

  1. scrambled7 says:

    I lack patience too, in some things.
    It’s really sad, because they might be really nice people and we really never take time to see because of the way they present themselves.
    Can’t blame them, can’t blame us either.


  2. suzicate says:

    This is the second post I’ve read today on this subject. This weekend I spent some time with someone I found to be totally delightful on her own merit except for the fact that she was a name dropper. I think she thought others would think more of her if they knew she “hob nobbed” with certain people. It totally turned me off for the sole reason that I liked her without the sugar coating and I’m just not impressed with celebrity statuses.


  3. I think everyone can be impatient sometimes. scrambled7 is right, it is sad but such is life and things like this happen.


  4. backonmyown says:

    We all have our failings. I’m afraid to start a list of my own. It might be rather lengthy.


  5. “Self Admiration” is a VERY poor quality to own, & the people who possess this, Bore Me! x


  6. Shonnie says:

    Hmmm…. I do not know quite how to respond. As usual I like your post and enjoyed the view from inside your mind. why do I hesitate? Well, I sometimes come across as that person you mentioned. I am not going to defend the person — because I do not think that is a defendable trait. 😀

    As always — lovely.


  7. eof737 says:

    I hear you and you are not alone in that failing; his braggadocio will bore me too and, like you, I want out. Such is life. 🙂


  8. says:

    I loved this sentence: “Well, that’s not exactly true but it will do for now.” because I find that what I’m trying to sometimes convey in words doesn’t often come out the way I mean it to. I like how you got past that part though and carried forth. On topic, I find talking about a person’s successes sort of a necessary evil in a self assuring way unless it gets invasive and uncaring for the other. Does that make sense? Because I do believe at times in life we must look back and think about our accomplishments to perhaps encourage ourselves to make another one.

    Thanks for this. As always it’s written with a lot of heart and thoughtfulness.


  9. Larry Lilly says:

    My dad told me that you learn more by listening than you teach by preaching.

    Boastful people however just display some shortcoming in personality by being that way, others its by fidgeting. To each their own, I hold no one more or less different than most of us, just a different form of neuroses.


  10. Julie says:

    I think that when we talk ourselves up, it’s because we feel small and insignificant and want attention. We look to the outside to puff up what we feel we can’t or don’t want to feed on the inside.


  11. I also have that failing and wish I was much more patient like you 🙂


  12. nelle says:

    We’ve been warned. 😉 We all have our issues, eh? Insecurity does drive a lot of boastful behaviour, because the speaker is trying to convince his or herself as much as try to convince you.


  13. I really like this post. Your self-criticism is very honest – most of us wouldn’t go beyond just thinking about how irritating the other person was; and feeling self-justified in doing so. You turned the tables on yourself; so you may have a failing, but you also have the very positive (and rare) attribute of humility. In contrast, many others in the same circumstances would have described (with hubris) their ‘lack of patience’ as ‘not suffering fools gladly’.


  14. ElizOF says:

    For some reason, I keep thinking I read a post here about the challenge you have with uploading your blog awards and/or pictures. I have added some basic instructions on uploading the blog awards on an old post… and you can do the same with pictures you see and like on Wikipedia. Here is the link: http://eof737.wordpress.com/2011/03/21/three-gifts-heart-matters-blog-awards-blog-hops%E2%80%A6/
    Peter, shoot me an email if you need clarifications. I know you can do this. 🙂


  15. Debbie says:

    Ouch! You got me on this one, Peter.


  16. Narelle says:

    Some people aren’t comfortable with silence, and feel they need to fill the space with something. Most people can talk about themselves very easily.


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